Letting go

It has been a busy month, Jackson's 5Th bd, Mr. Russell's 89Th bd and a contract on the Delor house! I hope this goes through without any hiccups. I had a goal of disposing of the house before the first anniversary of Kevin's death and it looks like it just may happen. Life is moving forward and I feel that I am progressing with it somewhat. School starts in 3 weeks and I know it will be good to get back to a routine that I can not simply decide not to stick to. I have to have deadlines of I don't get things done as quickly as I should.
I have come a long way from last September. I am no longer the sheltered 41 year old boy I was, now I am an ever learning man of 42. Kevin liked the idea that he took care of the details and I let him. Now I have learned what a disservice I did to myself by allowing it. I have had to do a lifetime of learning how to denial with the little intricacies of daily life in a very accelerated pace. Many things I knew of just not the details of how to do it, or why it had to be done. When I question why something should be done I simply tell myself because Kevin said that was the way to do it.
I have not been keeping up with this since Face book took over as my main form of communication. I am trying to do better but not always as good as I should be. Hopefully with the anniversary of Kevin's death quickly approaching I am beginning to recover the memories that I did not have following his death last year. I guess this is a good thing. I am waiting for the bottom to drop out and when it does I will pick yourself up.